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Rising Father

Dads, Celebrations Are Important. Here’s Why

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 Free to use under the Unsplash License https://unsplash.com/photos/z6CCIrypqyw Credit to: Dorien Monnens | @dorienmonnens

Making life special through celebrating special occasions and the “little things” can help you become a better dad and husband.

Are you one of those dads that claim to forget their own birthday?

    Do you cringe in absolute disgust when holidays appear on your calendar?

    If yes, then you’re not alone. According to a OnePoll study, 88 percent of Americans feel “stressed” when celebrating holidays or special occasions, and the average couple has seven arguments throughout the holiday season. 

    I get it.  I once felt the same exact way, before I was a dad that is. 

    You see, once I became a dad I realized something important. My wants, needs, and emotions no longer influence only me, but they influence my child as well. 

    You’ve heard it a thousand times, you read it in the parenting books your in-laws gifted you, but hardly touched, and what I’m about to write has probably already popped in your head:

    “Children are like sponges” 

    Yes, yes we all know this, right? But do we really? Do you live how you would want your child to live when they’re your age and have a family? Do you want your little boy or girl to have the  “negative Nancy” or “Debbie downer” traits that you display when it comes to celebrations? 

    Of course not. Good dads want their children to be the best they possibly can be, naturally. 

    Well, I’m going to say something you don’t want to hear, probably the same thing your significant other thinks around the time of these special dates that are hard on the wallet and even harder on your sanity.

    No one cares about how you feel. 

    When you become a father, a dad, a role model, a superhero to your child, your feelings need to stay in the hospital where they were born, if not there then the parking lot of that hospital where you realized you should’ve put the car seat in months ago. 

    Our feelings don’t matter anymore, I can’t stress this enough. Your sole priority in life should be protecting and providing for your family, raising your children right, and being a good spouse. 

The latter two of those statements both include not acting like a child throwing a temper tantrum when you have to hang the Christmas lights or going to Thanksgiving dinner where Auntie Helen drinks far too much hard apricot-apple cider and rants about the earth being flat. 

    Here are some reasons why celebrations are important and why as fathers, it’s our responsibility to make them fun, safe, and memorable for our families.

 *Free to use under the Unsplash License https://unsplash.com/photos/vcX5AhBwk6s Credit to: Jonathan Borba | @jonathanborba

Celebrations are beneficial to the development of your children

    Did you know that studies have shown that family celebrations contribute to building a child’s positive self-image, confidence, and social skills? 

    The family and cultural traditions that accompany celebrating holidays, birthday parties, or religious events help build a strong foundation of belonging and acceptance in children. Family celebrations give the opportunity for you as a dad to pause the hustle and bustle of daily life and take a moment to teach your children about the values, culture, and traditions you want them to pass on to their kids one day. 

    This has proven to be beneficial in their social development throughout the transition into adulthood, helping them make friends and a diverse social network. 

    So, this Christmas when you’re cursing under your breath when hanging ornaments on the tree (which is way too big for your house, but your spouse wanted “the pretty one”), think twice, because the only one that your attitude is affecting, is your kids.

Celebrating helps create positive memories for your family

 “Look at this photo of your grandpa (your name here), this is when he got home from work and went to bed at 8 after drinking two beers!”

    Not very memorable is it? 

    As a father, one of your responsibilities is to make those “picture-perfect” moments that your children can look back on and think, “Wow, my dad is the best and he always tried his hardest to make us happy.”

    Those moments simply aren’t going to happen if dad gets stressed and angry whenever a special occasion comes up. 

    If money is a factor in this hatred for celebrations, use less. Your family doesn’t care about piles of gift-wrapped presents or the top-of-the-line steakhouse. Your family wants you. 

    The next time the opportunity comes up for a little celebration, put a smile on that face, take out the camera and make priceless memories with your family.

Commemorating the “little things” will improve your marriage

Let’s face it. Socially and biologically, women are more likely to “stop and smell the roses” more often than men. 

It’s in our blood. Our manly ancestors or mancestors,  fought battles, won wars, and had to walk to school uphill both ways in a foot of snow after they fed the chickens on the family farm. 

    Things are different now, we men need to get more in touch with our feminine side and unwind slightly, not too much though. 

We need to celebrate the little things in life, not only because it will vastly improve our marriages, but it will contribute to a happier, healthier family unit. 

    Your wife got a raise at work? Break out the champagne and don’t forget to get her flowers. Your son got a solid C+ on that history test? Nothing wrong with that, it’s passing, right? Take him to Denny’s and give him a quick dad lesson on the Siege of Dunkirk.

    Your spouse will greatly appreciate your efforts and it will make her realize why she fell in love with you in the first place. As time goes on, celebrating the little things will help your mental state and your stress will begin to melt away. Both contribute to an improved marriage and a happier family.

Free to use under the Unsplash License https://unsplash.com/photos/73OJLcahQHg Credit to: Laura Fuhrman | @lauracathleen

Celebrations instill a sense of meaning and significance in our lives

Life can feel boring and meaningless sometimes, we all know this. Sometimes, I feel like I’m in a continuous, crippling cycle of work and sleep. 

    The feeling of dreading waking up in the morning is not something you want to pass on to your children. 

    “I’m a man and this is what men do! Work until they die!” 

    Yea, I get that. However, there is something called a “work-life” balance and if you agree with the statement above, then you need to reevaluate this balance. 

    Not for you. Your feelings don’t matter, remember? No, you need to adjust your work-life balance for your family because, at the end of the day, your boss doesn’t really care about you as a person. 

    Providing is the second biggest foundational pillar of being a father. The first is protecting. Protecting your family physically, but mentally as well. 

    Holidays, birthdays, and anniversaries are all worth going the extra mile to break up the monotony of life. It makes life seem special and meaningful and gives your family something to look forward to. 

    So, this Halloween when you’re complaining about your wife wanting you to dress up as Bruno from Disney’s Encanto, adjust your attitude and just put on the costume. 

    Life’s too short.

Thank you for reading,

Special thanks to Rising Father for featuring this article on www.risingfather.com!

Follow @risingfather on Instagram, a community of dads who value fatherhood, fitness, and freedom, and tune in to The Rising Father Podcast with host, Chris Rodack!

 Luke Ross is a husband, father, United States Marine Corps veteran and the founder of Dads Digging Deeper,a fatherhood  and parenting website that promotes the personal growth of men and the value that dads bring to society. Luke Ross is a Senior at Liberty University studying digital marketing and creative writing. 

Luke Ross                                                   

Dads Digging Deeper

 www.dadsdiggingdeeper.com 

Follow @dadsdiggingdeeper on Instagram and  Medium

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